Frequently Asked Questions

How can I know if spiritual direction is right for me?

Do you find yourself longing for a deeper connection with God? Are you in a season of transition or life change? Are you wrestling with doubt? Do you need God's guidance, comfort, or healing? Are you experiencing a season of spiritual dryness or staleness? Are you feeling a bit stuck spiritually? Or do you just want someone to talk to about your spiritual journey - wherever you are in it - mountain top, valley or somewhere in between?

If you answered yes to any of these questions, then spiritual direction could be helpful for you. Our sessions together will meet you where you are, with the Holy Spirit - the true director - guiding our conversations. It’s a very individual and personalised experience. 

How can I know if ministry supervision is right for me?

If you are looking for a place to reflectively explore your work and/or ministry with someone so that you can thrive within your vocation and be a safe, resident, and growing practitioner, then supervision could be a great space for you.

“A consistent finding…is the positive relationship of self-insight with both well-being and resilience. Within ministry, this finding supports ongoing interpersonal coaching and supervision of ministry workers to assist increased self-understanding and positive well-being where these are lacking.” Research Psychologist Kirsty Bucknell

If you’d like to have a short phone or online conversation so you can learn more about spiritual direction and/or ministry supervision, ask questions, and see if we might be a good fit, contact me to make an appointment.

Who uses spiritual direction and ministry supervision?

Spiritual direction will suit anyone who is longing to explore more of who God is to them and how to live more deeply and wholly in relationship with Him and others. Spiritual direction is a supportive space for anyone wherever they are in their journey with God.

Ministry supervision is particularly helpful for pastors, vicars, curates, lay leaders, and spiritual directors. They can all make use of the supervision space as they continue to grow and thrive in their leadership roles and ministry work.

What happens in a spiritual direction or supervision session?

Although no two sessions are completely the same, there are some common elements to our time together.

Sessions are 55 minutes in length. After you arrive and get settled - either in person or online - each session starts with the opportunity for a short time of silence. After this, we can start with wherever you find yourself in life or at work or with whatever issue, question or reflection you have brought with you. Throughout our time together we will follow the leading of the Holy Spirit as we prayerfully talk, listen, pause, reflect and explore the content of your life or work. When we finish our time together, we can end with prayer and/or make our next appointment together for the following month.

What can I hope to get from a spiritual direction session?

As you engage in spiritual direction conversations, you will be helped to move towards greater intimacy and wholeness in Jesus. The opportunity is there for you to:

  • tell your story

  • experience a safe place to be your authentic self

  • be seen, known, and loved

  • be still and listen for God’s voice

  • become more aware of God’s presence and activity in your everyday life

  • explore new spiritual practices

  • experience God in new and life-giving ways

  • learn to rest in God’s love

  • seek God’s wisdom and guidance

  • discover your true self and embrace who God designed you to be

  • pursue healing for your relationships with self, God and others

  • care for your soul.

What can I hope to get from a supervision session?

Supervision conversations create a space for you to become a more self-reflective leader as you explore the situations and relationships you’re working within with the goal of increasing confidence, proficiency, health and growth as a leader. You’ll be encouraged to:

  • reflect on ministry/work situations that are troubling, challenging, exciting

  • grow in confidence in your leadership role and practice

  • grow in resilience as a leader/pastor

  • create a space that helps you to untangle your thoughts and emotions relating to your work, and facilitate a wider-angle view of your world.

How often should we meet for spiritual direction or supervision?

Most people meet with me once a month, either online or in person in Dairy Flat, Auckland. A regular rhythm of spiritual direction and/or supervision helps you to attend to your spiritual health and vocational well-being, which of course flows into all areas of your life.

Is there a cost for spiritual direction or supervision?

Like other practitioners who have been professionally trained and who have ongoing costs associated with their practice, spiritual direction sessions and ministry supervision sessions are $100.00 for 55 minutes together. (By way of comparison, we pay our local plumbers $95 +GST.) Please note that cancelled appointments will be charged unless notice is given 24 hours prior except in the case of an emergency.

Online bank transfer is preferred ANZ 01-0735-0105946-000. I will invoice you after each session if you need one.

** If you’re based overseas, contact me to discuss payment options. Similarly, if cost is a barrier to you, please talk to me about arranging an alternative option. You can get in touch with me at: jacinda.lilly@gmail.com

How do I find a spiritual director or ministry supervisor?

You will want to find someone who is a good fit for you. While all certified spiritual directors have studied faith development, spiritual discernment and contemplative practices, each one reflects the programme where they received their training, as well as their unique background, theology/beliefs, interests and personality. Likewise with supervisors. While their training is broad, each practitioner will work with particular models of supervision and in particular spheres of work.

When choosing a director or supervisor, look for someone you resonate with. Someone who listens well; a person who has an active commitment to prayer and is growing in their own spiritual life and someone who helps you find the wisdom God has given you – within yourself and your experience. While it may be helpful to find a supervisor with a similar background or denomination to yours, sometimes a different perspective is more useful. This may take a few sessions together to discern and it’s helpful for us to review this together after 3 - 4 sessions. If I’m not the best fit for you, I may be able to recommend some other skilled practitioners.

How is spiritual direction different from therapy, counselling, and mentoring?

There are a number of helping and therapeutic relationships available to us and they have very real differences between them. In counselling, mentoring, therapy and spiritual direction the agenda, process, the role of the practitioner and the goal of the participant is quite distinctive.

Unlike counselling, which addresses psychological issues and problem-solving, spiritual direction focuses on your relationship with God—and is dependent on the leading of the Holy Spirit. The focus is on intimacy with God, not on solving problems.

Spiritual directors are not trained in psychotherapy or counselling (unless you encounter one who is trained to do both which I am not) so they do not diagnose or attempt to “fix” anyone’s problems. The focus is on God - listening and looking for His activity in your life and responding to His work in your life.

Spiritual direction is never a substitute for therapy.

Next steps ….

Email me at jacinda.lilly@gmail.com or fill out the contact form to begin a conversation. I offer a free initial conversation so we can explore whether we might be a good fit for each other.